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Archive for June, 2014

This week, I begin the final stage of my process to become a foster mom…the home study.  Over the next few months, my resource home worker will be making regular visits to assess my home and interview me.  She will be asking detailed questions about every aspect of my current life as well as my childhood.  We’ve been told to prepare for it to get very invasive.  In addition, she will be talking with my some of my friends and family to further learn about me.

She will also be informing me of changes that need to be made to my home (baby-proofing, etc) and then will check to ensure it has been completed in later visits.   There will also be home inspections by the health department and fire department.  Oh, and I still need to take a CPR and first aid certification class and will have two more packets of paperwork to complete.  So close yet so far!

The process is lengthy (on purpose) and honestly, at this point, I’m just ready for it to be done.  I understand why they need to do all of this.  It’s for the safety of the children.  But when you know you are an honest, caring person who will provide a safe and loving home for these children, it’s hard to be patient after a while.  I just want to get started!

Do I have everything I need to care for a child?  Absolutely not!  There’s still soooo much I need to do/buy/borrow.  So, I’m not actually prepared for a baby to enter my home at this point at all.  But I am ready for that baby.  I’m ready to be a mom.

A friend sent me an article today that profiled a long time foster parent.  In the article this mom mentioned that she felt being a foster parent was her life calling, that her role as a mother was what she did best.  Although I’m not a mom yet, that’s definitely how I feel.  I know this is what I am meant to do.  My years at Chara gave me a small glimpse into the world of foster care with infants and toddlers.  And I cherished every minute of it (even the moments that were frustrating or sad or scary).  The rewards far outweighed any of the hard times.  When I was at Chara with those kiddos, there was no other place in the world I wanted to be.  I knew this was what God was calling me to do, and I still feel that way.

But as I get closer to being approved, there is some definite fear that has set in.  Don’t get me wrong, there’s still lots of joyful anticipation and there are many days when you can’t wipe the smile off my face I’m so excited.  But there are also moments when I’m terrified (as I’m guessing all soon-to-be parents feel at some point before the baby comes).  Never doubting that this is the right decision, but just worrying, “how am I going to do this?”.  Becoming a mom (even though I may only be a temporary mom for these kiddos) is scary!  Exciting but scary!

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